October 2010
3 posts
September 2010
4 posts
DAMMIT I thought I separated everything out (and threw the worthless legumes in the TRASH CAN), but one mouthful of delightful rice snack was just RUINED by part of a PEA. NUT. SHIT.
I just got a box of oriental mix thinking “oh yes nothing but starchy vaguely soy-sauce flavored rice crisps” only to find that the thing is about 1/3 peanuts and almonds.
way to go, grocery store.
EDIT:
and cashews.
June 2010
1 post
BP Backlash
People are getting pretty pissed at BP. I think that you know why. Kevin Costner needs to create a machine that uses laughter to clean up oil. Then the Armed Farces could send all of the laughter from the audience to the gulf. We Just want to pull our weight.
http://graphjam.com/2010/06/14/funny-graphs-surface-earth/
http://www.energybranding.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/bp5.jpg
...
May 2010
1 post
so
I was driving past the Civic Center today, and I saw one of those official light-up road signs; you know, the ones that usually say “Drive time 45 minutes” or “Detour Ahead” or whatever.
This sign said “Gwinnett Graduates 2010: Expect Heavy Traffic” and for a half mile, I thought this might be a piece of advice. I mean, sure, I’m looking for a job right...
March 2010
1 post
December 2009
9 posts
Piano Man goes to war.
As everyone begins the hustle and bustle of the holiday season the Armed Farces would just like to say: slow down. Take some time from shooting people to enjoy playing a nice tune on a piano by yourself…in what looks like the motherland itself. So don your cap and go play a heart-warming song!
COMEDY DISCOVERY
I just realized that statistically, compound nouns are funnier than simple nouns.
example: cattle. not a funny word. cattlebumpers is a hilarious word.
try doing it with words that are related, also: shoefoot. lolololololol. wtf does that even mean?
NOTHING. its a made up word. but it rolls off the tongue so nicely.
for maximum comedic effect, say your newly-discovered compound noun aloud.
...
WatchThis is the most important thing for you to watch right this very instant. It’s a show from a year and a half ago, striped of all the inbetween-game chit-chat and downtime. It’s a lean 45 minutes of pure comedy athleticism. CATCH IT!
hiatus
watch out, Internet. I finally found the old facebook message where ben sent the name and password for this tumblr thing, so there’s no stopping me.
JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES AND JOKES.
more to come.
August 2009
5 posts
Prison. Is. Hilarious. →
July 2009
11 posts
monkeys are awesome. →
Fantastic. Now I won't be able to sleep for a... →
Who wants to feel uneasy? →
time to go to sleep
When you just Stumbled on commoncircle.com and thought the heading (Permaculture Education) said “Premature Ejaculation” and then chuckled to yourself, it’s time to go to sleep.
WatchIf you can make it through this video without bursting an embolism in your brain, give yourself a god damn medal. Also, the last ten seconds of this video is possibly the most vile and sadistic critique of our society and it makes me sick. This is less funny and more ruin-your-day infuriating. Enjoy!
Ben edit- I wouldn’t worry too much about the last 10 seconds. If you notice the little...
June 2009
17 posts
WatchBest movie of the year?
Looking to IMDB for Answers: 5 Thread Titles That...
1. Were the testicles necessary?
2. THE BEST SCENE WAS THE FOREST FIGHT!
3. How in the hell is there ‘no story’?
4. Anyone on this board excited for Avatar?
5. Why all the outrage over ‘racist robots’?
Things you need on a DVD to sell that DVD
(according to Zach Galifianakis)
1. Dinosaurs
2. Thunder
3. Race wars
4. Something
Cats
by Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Act 1:
Cats dance around and sing.
Act 2:
Cats dance around and sing.
Act 3:
Cats dance around and sing
Act 4:
Cats dance around and sing
Act 5:
Cats dance around a sing.
Nowhere in the entire play does anyone stop and say “Wait a second, cats can’t dance OR sing.”
blogging
Have we as a society gotten to the point where we can use the word “blog” in a sentence without sounding like a complete douche? I’m not talking about a “cyber-sentence” or something we write in an email or text message. I mean the physical act of making your throat and tongue and mouth work together to pronounce the word “blog.” Have we gotten to that...
